There\u2019s a kind of tired that no nap, no bath, and no weekend off can fix. That\u2019s emotional exhaustion, and it hits hard when your inner battery is beyond empty.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
You\u2019re not lazy. You\u2019re not \u201ctoo sensitive.\u201d You\u2019re emotionally exhausted, and yes, that\u2019s a real psychological state backed by science. In fact, studies show prolonged emotional stress can dysregulate your nervous system, cloud your thinking, and even suppress your immune function.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\ud83d\udcda Source: McEwen, B. S., 2006, Protective and damaging effects of stress mediators<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n So if you\u2019re feeling mentally checked out, constantly on edge, or like the smallest task might break you, you\u2019re not imagining it. These are the very real signs of emotional burnout.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Let\u2019s walk through exactly what emotional exhaustion looks like, how it creeps in, and what you can do to finally start feeling like yourself<\/em> again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n [Read: Why am I so sensitive? How to stop being sensitive and grow a thick skin<\/a>]<\/p>\n\n\n\n Since emotional exhaustion can manifest just like stress and even anxiety, it can be difficult to know the difference. <\/p>\n\n\n\n And since you can\u2019t treat all of them the same way, you need to be able to tell which is which so you can fix it correctly.<\/p>\n\n\n\n When sleeping doesn\u2019t make you feel rested or any better, you know it\u2019s emotional exhaustion. It doesn\u2019t just go away with a good night of sleep, it\u2019ll be there until you can actually solve the problem and get things off your chest.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Relaxing and unwinding are good ways to get rid of stress and anxiety. But if these normal techniques don\u2019t work, you\u2019re probably emotionally exhausted. <\/p>\n\n\n\n You\u2019ll need a different approach to get rid of it, most likely tackling the thing that’s emotionally exhausting you head-on. [Read: Really quick stress busters to recharge your mind<\/a>]<\/p>\n\n\n\n If you\u2019re cranky and angry for seemingly no reason, you might be emotionally exhausted. When your emotions are basically fried, anything can result in anger and frustration instead of a reasonable reaction.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Insomnia can also be a side effect of stress but if you still can\u2019t sleep after relaxing the way you usually do, it\u2019s a problem. <\/p>\n\n\n\n No matter how much you want to fall asleep, you just can\u2019t. That\u2019s how you know it\u2019s more than everyday stress. [Read: How to make life easier – 20 steps to go from exhausted to effortless<\/a>]<\/p>\n\n\n\n Your dreams and your emotions are very closely related. If you\u2019re having nightmares, there\u2019s something wrong in your subconscious. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Even if you don\u2019t consciously realize it, it\u2019s manifesting in your dreams and it\u2019s probably emotional exhaustion.<\/p>\n\n\n\n This is probably the biggest sign you\u2019re emotionally exhausted. When you can\u2019t make yourself feel things, it\u2019s because your emotions are at an overwhelming level. This manifests in an unattached feeling of emptiness. [Read: Emotional attachment<\/a> – how it works and 34 signs you’re getting attached and close<\/a>]<\/p>\n\n\n\n When you push yourself beyond your limit, it\u2019s really hard to concentrate. You can\u2019t seem to focus on tasks and your mind slips often. If this happens a lot, you could be emotionally exhausted.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Just like stress can harm your immune system, so can emotional exhaustion. If you keep getting sick and are also experiencing some of these other effects, it\u2019s a huge sign your emotions are in overdrive. [Read: The big health benefits of sex and more that’ll help you live longer!<\/a>]<\/p>\n\n\n\n When you\u2019re emotionally exhausted you just can\u2019t eat. No matter how hungry you are, you just can\u2019t get food down. If this happens to you often, seek some help so you can eat properly again!<\/p>\n\n\n\n When you\u2019re emotionally exhausted, you’re likely to get headaches. Your brain is working extra hard to process what\u2019s going on and it often manifests itself in this way, making it hard to concentrate on anything. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Emotional exhaustion often makes you feel totally lacking in motivation. You’re so overwhelmed, it’s very hard to find the ‘get up and go’ to go and do anything. Of course, this just makes the whole situation worse. [Read: 19 life quotes to motivate you to live a better life<\/a>]<\/p>\n\n\n\n In this state, everything feels overwhelming, even small tasks that you’d normally get done in a few minutes. <\/p>\n\n\n\n You can’t concentrate well enough to make headway, and it causes you to procrastinate and feel even more stressed. <\/p>\n\n\n\n If you’re finding that you make mistakes that you’d normally never make, it could be because you’re feeling emotionally drained and productivity has gone out of the window. <\/p>\n\n\n\n There doesn’t seem to be an end in sight, you feel that you’re always going to be in this state and always feel totally exhausted and overwhelmed. [Read: Feeling trapped in a relationship – why you feel stuck and what you must do<\/a>]<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83d\udc49 Want to understand emotional exhaustion better? Read these guides:<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n There are many reasons why your emotions are throwing you for a loop. The problem is, most people can’t pinpoint the cause. <\/p>\n\n\n\n This is largely because they are so used to approaching things the same way. But what they don’t realize is that their routines are causing them to feel mentally tired. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Here are some examples:<\/p>\n\n\n\n A lot of times, our emotions are influenced by the people we interact with. Conflicts will arise and there’s not much you can do about your initial feelings and reactions. How you continue to deal with it, however, will determine your emotional stability<\/a>. [Read: 44 stress-free ways to ignore someone and stop people from hurting you<\/a>]<\/p>\n\n\n\n A toxic relationship with your significant other can drain you emotionally because you exert too much effort just to keep it afloat. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Not to mention, if you live with your partner, then you’re around this emotional roller-coaster<\/a> of a person all the time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Some people can drain you emotionally because you’re forced to give your attention to them when you’re spread too thin already. <\/p>\n\n\n\n It is necessary to maintain your friendships, but sometimes the friends we choose can be more than we can handle. [Read: Real friends vs fake friends – 21 ways to weed out users and bad ones<\/a>]<\/p>\n\n\n\n These are the relationships that you were born with. Pushing them out of your life can be emotionally taxing, but being in an unhealthy relationship<\/a> may be just as hazardous.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Even though you think you can handle a lot of tasks physically, mental and emotional strain will also take their toll. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Even if you’re not consciously investing your feelings in the matter, your emotions can be affected by the stress. [Read: How to get rid of nervousness and calm your mind wherever you are<\/a>]<\/p>\n\n\n\n When you fail to reward yourself or do things that benefit you, your emotions can be affected. The part of your brain that feels joy stops functioning properly because it doesn’t register any rewarding moments. [Read: Inspiring ways to bring out the best in yourself<\/a>]<\/p>\n\n\n\n There are a lot of bad things happening in the world. If you start to absorb all those negative feelings, you may feel a strain on your emotions. <\/p>\n\n\n\n This is especially true when you feel that you can’t do anything to make the world a better place; hopelessness can be the ultimate stressor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Being a perfectionist can also drain you emotionally. When you don’t achieve the level of perfection that you want, you can start to feel bad about your lack of achievement. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Letting go of the things you can’t control is a better alternative, while still allowing you to seek perfection where it is possible. [Read: Dating a perfectionist – the things you must know before you date one<\/a>]<\/p>\n\n\n\n When you’re sick, you may be physically incapacitated. The stress of your sickness, or even the stress of being forced to stay in bed, can affect your emotions.<\/p>\n\n\n\n When your body feels bad, so does your mind.<\/p>\n\n\n\n When you keep agreeing to things that you don’t want to do, you will undoubtedly feel some sort of resentment. <\/p>\n\n\n\n This can manifest through your emotions and, eventually, your energy levels. [Read: People pleaser – 21 signs you’re one and how to stop people pleasing<\/a>]<\/p>\n\n\n\n If your bedroom, office space, or even your neighborhood is a mess, the effect of that disorganized environment can seep through to your emotions. That’s why some people feel frustrated when they’re working in a messy or noisy area. [Read: Tips on how to be a less materialistic person<\/a>]<\/p>\n\n\n\n Putting all your hopes on something or someone can be dangerous. <\/p>\n\n\n\n If you fail to receive the support that you need, or if you fail to acquire the object\/situation you want, your disappointment can greatly affect your emotions, leading to emotional exhaustion. [Read: 52 happy habits and ways to find happiness within yourself and feel better<\/a>]<\/p>\n\n\n\n When you choose to do things that don’t make you happy, you are sacrificing your ability to find contentment and joy. <\/p>\n\n\n\n When you stop feeling these things, your emotions will suffer a huge blow, and you can develop depression as a consequence, a condition frequently associated with exhaustion or lethargy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Pretending to be \u201cfine\u201d when you’re not? That\u2019s emotional labor, the energy it takes to mask your true emotions to keep others comfortable. Over time, it drains you more than any physical task. \ud83d\udcda Source: Hochschild, A. R., 1983, The Managed Heart: Commercialization of Human Feeling<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n If you constantly feel on edge, like you can\u2019t relax no matter how much you try, it may be because your nervous system is stuck in fight-or-flight mode. Chronic stress floods the body with cortisol and adrenaline, leaving you wired and worn out at the same time. \ud83d\udcda Source: Arnsten, A. F., 2009, Stress signalling pathways that impair prefrontal cortex structure and function<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n Spending hours scrolling TikTok, reading bad news, or watching content you don\u2019t even enjoy can fry your brain. This low-level, constant stimulation tricks your body into stress mode while giving you zero emotional payoff. \ud83d\udcda Source: Montag, C., & Elhai, J. D., 2020, Digital media use and mental health<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n If your exhaustion comes out of nowhere or seems disproportionate to your current situation, unresolved trauma could be the culprit. <\/p>\n\n\n\n The brain and body hold onto old pain, and certain triggers can set off a full-blown emotional crash. \ud83d\udcda Source: Van der Kolk, B. A., 2014, The Body Keeps the Score<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n When you\u2019re constantly doing things that don\u2019t feel true to who you are, staying in the wrong job, friendship, or relationship, it creates a quiet kind of emotional fatigue. Over time, that dissonance becomes draining. \ud83d\udcda Source: Deci, E. L., & Ryan, R. M., 2009, The “what” and “why” of goal pursuits<\/a> <\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83d\udc49 Want to go deep and learn more about emotional draining? Start here:<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n First things first, it’s important to give yourself a break! Once you’ve identified that you’re suffering from emotional exhaustion, be kind to yourself. In fact, you should be kind to yourself anyway! <\/p>\n\n\n\n However, no more than ever before, it’s time to show yourself the love that you always show to other people. On top of that, these tips will also help you put an end to feeling emotionally drained. [Read: 55 secrets and self-love habits to build confidence and realize your worth<\/a>]<\/p>\n\n\n\n In order to stop feeling emotionally drained, you must first find the main cause of it all. Review the reasons we listed above and see what fits your situation. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Once you know where the emotional strain is coming from, you can then take the necessary steps to change and eliminate the stressor. <\/p>\n\n\n\n If the problem lies in your relationships, you need to acknowledge the problem and discuss it with those people. <\/p>\n\n\n\n It may not be resolved the first time you talk about it, but that first step will go a long way in improving your relationships, and your mental health. [Read: How to find inner peace in a messy relationship<\/a>]<\/p>\n\n\n\n You have to start thinking about yourself and what you need to survive. Do what you need to do to achieve your goals, but consider how this will affect those around you, as well. <\/p>\n\n\n\n The best way to do this is to delegate your tasks, take time to find what makes you happy, and pursue your dreams.<\/p>\n\n\n\n You can’t control how people think, but you can make small changes that can greatly improve your disposition. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Remember, you can improve your environment and how you take care of your body. You can also change how you think and react so that you can communicate better with the people around you. [Read: Be your own hero – What it means and how to take control of life<\/a>]<\/p>\n\n\n\n None of this can be possible if you don’t believe that you can do it. Most of us are limited by what we were taught, like not being able to make a change because of a lack of money or time, or not having supportive people in our life. But that’s the thing: those are just limitations. <\/p>\n\n\n\n We can break through boundaries by finding strength in ourselves. If you need a little help, just take a look inside you, and try your hardest, chances are, you’ll see that you are capable of change.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Yes, this means a vacation. You need to clear your head and calm your emotions. Sometimes that means taking a step back from everyone and everything and just allowing yourself to be free of any outside influences. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Go take a weekend to yourself and get your emotions in check. [Read: 15 reasons why you should travel at least once a year<\/a>]<\/p>\n\n\n\n If you close yourself off and keep every single emotion you feel buried inside of you, you\u2019ll end up emotionally exhausted. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Cry when you need to. Get mad when you need to. Confront people who upset you. Communicate your feelings and you\u2019ll feel better. [Read: Calm your mind – how to get the inside voices out of your head<\/a>]<\/p>\n\n\n\n If you really can\u2019t get a hold of your emotions, go ahead and seek professional help. There\u2019s nothing wrong with getting help if it makes you feel better. <\/p>\n\n\n\n You don\u2019t want your emotional exhaustion to impact your life permanently and sometimes, only professionals can help. [Read: <\/strong>Why am I so emotional? Emotional stability and 27 secrets to balance life<\/a>]<\/p>\n\n\n\n When emotionally exhausted, it is not something you want to admit to everyone. When you can\u2019t take it anymore, it sometimes feels like giving up or that you failed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n That isn\u2019t the case. Just pick up where you left off. But, sometimes you should learn to control the things you can and accept that which you can\u2019t. You are only human, so stop beating yourself up for not being able to do everything.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Emotional exhaustion comes from taking on the emotional ills of everyone else around you. If you\u2019re too empathetic, you absorb the trials and tribulations of just about everyone in your life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n That leaves you an emotional sponge. At some point, you aren\u2019t going to be able to take any more and find yourself emotionally exhausted, with your crap and everyone else\u2019s.<\/p>\n\n\n\n If you learn to say no to taking on everyone else\u2019s problems, you have more energy to deal with your own. [Read: How to say no – 15 ways to reason politely, stop pleasing, and feel kickass<\/a>]<\/p>\n\n\n\n You could be feeling emotionally exhausted because you carry around a backpack of all the things out of your control<\/a>, all the people you have done something to, or all the occasions you simply can\u2019t grant yourself forgiveness for.<\/p>\n\n\n\n If you stop and give yourself a break by putting down the backpack every once in a while, you find life doesn\u2019t have to be as heavy all the time. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Why do you always have to be so hard on yourself and expect more from yourself than you would from anyone else?<\/p>\n\n\n\n If you feel emotionally exhausted, you probably place everyone else\u2019s needs before your own. There is no shame in taking time for yourself to unwind and work through your emotional hardships.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Find a hobby, set aside time to go for a run, or find that one thing that brings you solace. You deserve to have your own time. If you don\u2019t take it, you are never going to heal from your exhaustion and fill back up.<\/p>\n\n\n\n When you fill your body with all the nutrition it needs, it will reward you with strength and energy. Of course, when you have those two things, it’s much easier to focus and start to feel better in yourself. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Focus on fresh fruits and vegetables, and go organic where you can. Of course, you can have your favorite snacks, but just enjoy them in moderation. <\/p>\n\n\n\n That doesn’t mean exercise to excess, but focus on regular, gentle to moderate exercise throughout the week. <\/p>\n\n\n\n When you move your body more, endorphins are released by the brain and they have an almost magical, uplifting effect on your emotional exhaustion. [Read: The benefits of exercise on your mind, body, and libido<\/a>]<\/p>\n\n\n\n If you drink alcohol, it’s important to limit your intake as this will do nothing but worsen your emotional exhaustion. <\/p>\n\n\n\n If you use substances, it’s a very wise idea to stop. These are all negative coping mechanisms that will harm your progress and keep you stuck. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Mindfulness is a very beneficial practice for everyone but when you feel emotionally drained, it’s even more beneficial. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Mindfulness helps you to manage your emotions and remain in the moment, therefore stopping you from acting out of anger or upset. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Talk to yourself as if you were your own best friend, because you should be!<\/p>\n\n\n\n Show yourself some kindness and you’ll start to realize that taking on too much will only ever make you feel down and drained. [Read: Positive self-talk – what it is, where it comes from, and how to master it<\/a>]<\/p>\n\n\n\n Positive mantras are easy to incorporate into your day and will have a revolutionary effect on your life. <\/p>\n\n\n\n If you find that certain things emotionally exhaust you, it may mean that your life no longer has a place for them. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Their toxic energy is so consuming that you actually become worn down by it. That\u2019s not healthy and it\u2019s definitely not something you should deal with.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Sometimes you have to separate your feelings from a situation and assess it from afar. Doing this can help you pinpoint exactly what\u2019s causing the issue so you can correct it. [Read: Stress ruining your relationship? Signs and quick fixes<\/a>]<\/p>\n\n\n\n Anyone and everyone can feel emotionally drained from time to time, but there are some groups of people who are more at risk than others: <\/p>\n\n\n\n 1.<\/strong> People with demanding jobs<\/p>\n\n\n\n 2. <\/strong>Those struggling with perfectionism<\/p>\n\n\n\n 3. <\/strong>People who often feel lonely<\/p>\n\n\n\n 4.<\/strong> Those who place self-care at the bottom of their priority list [Read: How to take care of yourself emotionally and avoid falling apart<\/a>]<\/p>\n\n\n\n If you continue down the road you’re going, you’ll be burned out and unable to process anything that comes your way. It’s not a path to choose when you already know that you have a problem. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Choosing to do something about your emotional exhaustion now means that you’ll be able to overcome it and learn for the future. These tips should help you do just that. <\/p>\n\n\n\nHow to know if you\u2019re emotionally exhausted and what to do about it<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
1. Sleep doesn’t help<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
2. Relaxation techniques don’t help <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
3. You feel very irritable and you don’t know why <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
4. You can’t sleep <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
5. You have nightmares<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
6. You feel unattached to things and people <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
7. You can’t concentrate<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
8. You get sick often <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
9. A change in appetite<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
10. You get frequent headaches<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
11. You struggle to feel motivated<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
12. Even small tasks feel overwhelming<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
13. You make uncharacteristic mistakes<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
14. You feel you could always be stuck this way <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
\n
What makes you feel emotionally drained?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
1. Indulging in bad relationships <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Romantic relationships <\/h4>\n\n\n\n
Social relationships<\/h4>\n\n\n\n
Familial relationships <\/h4>\n\n\n\n
2. Taking on too much <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
3. Not doing enough for yourself <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
4. Reading bad news <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
5. Perfectionism<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
6. Poor health <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
7. People pleasing <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
8. A cluttered and messy environment <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
9. Codependency <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
10. Not doing what makes you happy <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
11. Emotional labor<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
12. Nervous system overload<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
13. Doomscrolling and digital fatigue<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
14. Unhealed trauma and emotional flashbacks<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
15. Living out of alignment with your values<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
\n
How can you change things and stop feeling emotionally drained?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
1. Identify the source <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
2. Communicate with your loved ones<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
3. Put yourself first <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
4. Change what you can <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
5. Find your strength<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
6. Take a break from everything <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
7. Don’t try and push your emotions down <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
8. Seek professional help <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
9. Recognize you are only human <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
10. Learn to say no <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
11. Forgive yourself<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
12. Do what you love just because you can <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
13. Eat healthily <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
14. Exercise regularly <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
15. Limit alcohol use and cut out substance use <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
16. Practice mindfulness <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
17. Use positive self-talk<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Things that emotionally exhaust you might be bigger signs of trouble<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
Who is at risk of emotional exhaustion?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
Emotional exhaustion needs to be addressed<\/h2>\n\n\n\n